Tip #1. Sweeping and Mopping the floors:
Have your dog (or borrow neighbors') sweep the floor with tail and lick up all the crumbs.
Tip #2. Vacuuming:
Call for demo from salesman. Have him show you how the vacuum works in all parts of the house. Tips for success: Don't always call the same company: keep a chart and rotate.
Tip #3. Dusting:
Only do what is eye level or below. And only right before someone is coming over.
Tip #4. Laundry:
First find a good place to hide it! Unless you have to do it - like you have no underwear (heck, who needs underwear).
Tip #5. Cleaning Toilet:
Close the lid
Tip #6. Cleaning Shower:
Close the Shower door or curtain
Tip #7. Cleaning the rest of the bathroom:
Close the bathroom door (tell guests the restroom is out of commission and to use neighbors')
Tip #8. Taking out the trash:
If you can't find anyone in your house to take it out...bribe a neighbor - say you hurt your back or some other sob story - that one might be good for getting at least a few sympathy dinners out of the neighbor as well! Try not to use it often, they might get suspicious.
Tip #9. Dishes:
Dishwasher..if it doesn't come off, run it again and again and if that doesn't work.. throw the dish out and start fresh.. better yet...paper plates, plastic utensils, and plastic cups are a far better way to go. (as long as your neighbor is taking out the trash).
*~If all else fails - call your mom and tell her you don't know how to do it, will she show you~*
